Wait, I do that everyday......
So last month, my birthday was pretty much a blip on the radar, and it was lost in the shuffle of buying a house, moving, and dealing with some tough life situations. 33 came and went without much fanfare, which is fine by me. But this year is definitely a different year for me, obviously with Miss Lila Eve on the way, and things to worry about like juggling work and a baby for the first time, paying for a house and the things that come with it. It's a little daunting feeling like a real adult for the first time.
As I sit here and enjoy my coffee and Cinnamon Toast Crunch in bed in my PJ pants, here are a few things I've learned in the 33 years I've been on earth.
1) You're going to realize that your parents were right like 90% of the time.
Ok so they didn't do like all the things right, like that time you had thick bangs cut straight across your forehead. Or like letting you ride bikes with your friends without helmets. But you're going to look back on advice they gave you on money decisions, life in general or school things, and one day you're going to have that face palm moment to where you go... "I should have listened to my dad/mom". And the older I get, the more I realize that what they have taught me has truly rubbed off. You look in the mirror and all the sudden, you've become your parents. How did that happen!
2) But to follow that up, even if they did get it right and you didn't, you'll still figure it out on your own.
Back in the day in college, I wanted to be a doctor, then a lawyer, then a physical therapist, then a nurse. There were so many things that I loved about those jobs, but the doors kept closing. I was 3rd in my class in high school, but as I got rejected from each post grad school I applied to, I felt like a huge failure. It sucked. So I started working. When I got my current job in 2007, I didn't think I'd be there long.....I did leave it for about a year, but I've been back for 4 years this month. Here I am almost 7 years later. Do I love what I do every day? Not all the time. But do I love that I have a great life and have made great friends because of that place? Absolutely. And I figured that out on my own. From aspirations of wanting to be a pediatrician, to being a software account manager, a spin instructor and a small time blogger....eh, it works!
I have been told so many times that I'm intimidating. I don't know how a chipmunk faced 5'2 adult can be that way, but, I GUESS I have the tendency to be intense at times. Both professionally and personally. And that's just me. You can take it or leave it. I've managed to calm down and not be so crazy at times, but I will rip you a new one if you mess up any of my credit card or utility bills!
Oh and pregnancy judgement...yeah, it's there too (SORRY I have to address this, because it's a new thing lately). Everyone has an opinion. But I listen to my doctor and read a lot of books. Super sorry if you don't agree, It's my life and this baby girl is still kicking me fiercely. Heaven forbid some of you ask me what mine and J's parenting style will be like. I grew up with a military Dad and 2 military grandfathers, so discipline is a big thing for us......sorry not sorry :)
4) GET SOME SLEEP!
Sleep is key. 8 hours or more. If you're burning the candle at both ends, you will suffer mentally, emotionally and physically. You will eventually turn into Jerry McGuire and everyone will stare at you as you have a debilitating flip out one day as you leave work. WHO'S COMING WITH ME???
5) Relax about your job and control what you can control.
Gah....J and I have this conversation all the time. Work can drain you. It's where you spend 8 hours a day or more. But why are you stressing about the fact that your co-worker like didn't do their job, but that has nothing to do with what you're doing? Or someone that you were depending on was off one day when you needed them, and you wanted to cry? You can't control life circumstances. I mean, come on, worry about YOU. And be happy, dangit. If someone gets mad at you over something that isn't your fault, it's not the end of the world. I'm not curing cancer everyday, I'm offering people solutions to problems that may or may not work in a constantly changing industry (Now if you ARE trying to cure cancer and you mess up, well, then that's on you). Get a grip, worry about you, but try to be nice to everyone. RE-LAAAAAAAAAAAX.
6) Set up a budget and don't live like a college freshman with your parent's credit card for "emergencies only".
Like an emergency was stuff like new shoes and an awesome dress for ZTA formal. Now I will say, because my parents never handed me a credit card to begin with when I left home, I never had the luxury of a new spring wardrobe like some of my college girl buddies. I worked all through college and paved my own way. Which is why I'm so money conscious now. I do set a weekly budget, which we try to stick to, and we save a ton and probably live as cheap as we can. It's worth it when emergencies pop up not having to whip out the credit card.
7) Spend time with your loved ones, because you don't know when they're going to be gone one day.
Life is so short. Last month was hard with the loss we dealt with regarding J's grandfather. But we made the effort to see him a lot and I cherish the time with him. Life is too short to spend all your time with just you. Yes you should be selfish and take weekends to yourself sometimes, but spend time with the ones you love. Your life will be enriched to a point you never imagined.
8) Your group of friends will get smaller the older you get, but you'll love it.
This is how I feel about my best friends. "Yellow" starts playing in my heart. But on the real, the days of coordinating a weekend with 15 people will start to dwindle. And you'll be so happy for it. Life will be more simple. You'll lose touch with people, but you'll follow them on Facebook and be happy for them. You're not a jerk for not keeping a full social calendar.
9) You're going to look at your spouse/fiance/significant other and want to kill them and love them all at the same time. And that's ok.
It's so funny the things couples argue over. Money. Who ate the last piece of bread? Why is the house so MESSY when I cleaned it a day ago? I can't imagine life without J. Before he came along, I wanted to be Miss Independent and not have someone to lean on. When he showed up randomly into my life almost 5 years ago, something just worked.
One time, a good girlfriend asked me how married life was. My answer....it's hard. It IS! She was shocked I said that. And to explain, I said this. "You're going to have moments where you're so angry, you want to throat punch the other person and just get away. But when you realize you're going to look at that person for the rest of your life EVERY SINGLE DAY and they're going to get fat, and wrinkly, and probably super crabby, and you don't want to be with anyone else but them, then you know you've found the right person." She said nobody had every explained that to her before and she was thankful for the real life perspective.
10) And this brings me to a close but TAKE CARE OF YOUR SKIN, ESPECIALLY YOUR FACE
Like my 95 year old granny always said to me....you only get one face. I quit the tanning beds when I was 24. That was probably 5 years too late. I've had a mole removed, some small basal cell things frozen off my face, and since being scolded by my dermatologist (which by the way if you live in Charleston and want to go to her, she's AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGGG), I've kept up a good skin routine. It involves sunscreen every single day (with a CC Cream, which is awesome, PM me and I'll tell you what I use), and I also wash and moisturize my face every night. I don't use the same stuff all the time, but I do use what my dermatologist has developed thanks to a lovely Christmas gift and my skin has never looked better.
I also have friends in the skin care business that have given me so much great stuff over the years that I can't help by try it all out. I am a big fan of microdermabrasion. I tend to lean towards scrubs for some reason. I've never had it done professionally, but as I get older, fine lines start to appear. For 2 years, I used the Neutrogena Microdermabrasion System. Mainly because it cost 20 bucks in a box, BUT, this stuff works. My pores shrank and my skin smoothed out and I love that thing. It's also great for sun damage, and I have a very splotchy, red skin tone and it helps even things out.
OH, sidebar, prenatal vitamins help too. Great for hair and nails, yes, but my skin has been so amazing. I'm taking those suckers forever. I've discovered the fountain of youth!
Recently, a good friend of mine sent me a sample of Rodan + Fields Microdermabrasion Paste. The very first time I used it, my face felt like baby skin. Smooth and completely buffed of imperfections. I made Jarrett feel it in bed the other night, and even he was impressed. I'm still using this small tube of stuff right now and I can tell a huge difference in the texture of my skin. My makeup goes on smoother and I haven't had a face zit in quite some time. I highly recommend you guys giving this a try if you want. I've heard nothing but great things about R + F and have a great consultant if you guys are interested in reaching out to her. Check out my lovely friend Jordan, she is a sweet dear friend of mine in the Columbia area as is kicking tail as an independent consultant. She's a wife and mom and is 100% behind this business, so I'm giving her a shout because I love what she sent me and will definitely be trying some other things! GO CHECK OUT MY GIRL JO! And check out their before and afters, everyone is definitely aging in reverse. Get on the bandwagon, this stuff is good.
This is me, direct sunlight about a month ago, with a wrinkle free forehead. (Ok I did Botox once, but a LONG time ago). But this is at least 2 years worth of using microdermabrasion products, no further Botox, and just good clear skin to show for staying out of the sun and taking care of my skin.
Long story short, take care of yourself. I look back at this post and it's all common sense stuff, but I wouldn't have listened to any of this from a old 33 year old 10 years ago.
Much love you guys, have a great weekend!
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